To kill or not to kill
To kill or not to kill that is the question whether it is better to live in emotional agony or to rot in jail
whether it be a fast death or a slow agonizing one such as the one she gave my heart oh how i long to end my suffering and so many other things along with it, oh how i wish i could just make a problem disappear, oh how i wish for salvation, from memories,thoughts,the future and most importantly and most dangerous the present, for reality is but a lie created by our minds to protect us from the truth i wish to know what is worse than my reality, is it karma, is it god? for as many times as i have i tried i have failed or suceeded only to fail, is this god in the picture?, is this something else karma perhaps?, or perhaps my life is some sort of show directed and written by sadists, as i trapse through my life i find myself finding happiness if only for five minutes or in the space of 5 seconds if it be a kiss from a generous friend, i find Bliss in those small moments of which most would find insignificant for their duration is so short i say NO. At the point of my life i am at i must grab and treasure every bit of happiness and bliss life gives me, for i am made to suffer this much i do know, i was not designed with happiness in mind, the more i think about it i find myself bellieving that my life is a sick and twisted sitcom reserved for only the most twisted of deities, oh deities how i wish you could change,oh deities how i long for bliss, yet i put my self through un needed suffering, oh the irony, i say i long for bliss yet i push it away,i sabotage myself and my loved ones so that my life is always agonizing and never any good, so i ask again TO KILL OR NOT TO KILL the question is WHO?
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